You Satisfy

I have had plenty of time to think recently. At work when I wash dishes, while I ice or get massaged at physical therapy, or as I sit in the still quiet of the evenings at home, my mind wanders. I usually ponder my own level of contentment and my progress – both physically and spiritually. Where am I? How am I? Am I satisfied?

I know when I meet with Jesus Christ and commune with God, whether in my car, in my room with the door shut, or in the hustle of city, I walk away satisfied. Every time. Whether I worship, whether I pray, whether I petition, whether I read, or whether I sit in meditation, he fills me up with joy and freedom and a childlike confidence. Every time.

I need it. He reminds me who I am and who he is. He gives grace to me and injects hope and expectation into my soul. He pulls me out of the pit of discouragement and disappointment and seats me with him in heavenly places.

My circumstances often do not change. Though I believe for healing, I usually wake up to a “good morning” from soreness, stiffness, and sometimes pain. Where do I go in that moment? Do I run to despair? Do I bury myself in my phone? Do I medicate myself with things of the world? If I want real joy that changes me and bursts and surges out of the innermost parts of my being – a joy that cracks my pursed lips into a beaming smile – I will only find it in him. In the same way that Jesus said “Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?” (Luke 2:49), I must be with him. Every day. Multiple times.

When I spend time with him, I find that he unlocks the doors of spiritual wisdom and invites me in to discover the greatness and surpassing worth of the kingdom. He beckons me into life-changing discoveries that lift my head and set me soaring above and beyond the cares, concerns, and pressures of this life and my career. I am free. I am myself more than ever. When I live out of this position, the kingdom of God no longer becomes “a matter of talk, but power” (1 Corinthians 4:20). He clothes me with himself and the Spirit he placed in me comes alive in greater measure.

So, I need to let him in. He always knocks. Open the door.