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Why Sexual Sin Wreaks Havoc

Why Sexual Sin Wreaks Havoc

1960’s Sexual Revolution became a turning point in the direction of American culture morality. Many of us Baby Boomers were caught up in the noise and entered our tender teenage years in the 70’s when the “pill” became readily available and sexual restraints were thrown to the wind. The perceived freedom laid claim to quite a few victims as we were told that our bodies are our own and we can do with them whatever we want. But no-one cared to inform us of the wounds this behavior would cause to our souls and our emotions. And many of us are still paying the price for a “freedom” that only created a prison of pain and regret.

What is it about sexual misuse that places it in a category of its own?

We were clearly created as sexual beings. Our very physiology conveys that exhibit A fits nicely with Exhibit B.  Add to this, the surge of hormones that flood the body creating a euphoric experience in the shape of oxytocin and endorphins, well, it’s clear that our Creator in His kindness made this experience for pleasure as well as “multiplying and subduing the earth”. But He also gave us clear parameters and if we examine the whole of His Word, we can see the overarching theme of the intimacy He wants with His people.

God is the Lover, the Husband, the One Who dwells within His people. He uses imagery of the slighted husband as his wife prostitutes herself, yet he buys her back on the slave block and kindly redeems her, without shaming her. Ultimately, we see the loving, patient Bridgroom waiting for His bride and the culmination of these last times events is breathtaking! Paul writes to the believers in Ephesus that when he speaks of the dynamics of the marriage union, he mysteriously is speaking of Christ and the church (Eph. 5:21-33).

So is it any wonder that sexual violations soulishly affect humans at a level we may not understand? Yet, its affects can seep through like stench from a home built upon a garbage dump replete with toxic waste.

We were meant to live out our sexuality within the bounds of marriage because the grander picture is our One Husband saving Himself for His one bride…deeply committed and deeply connected, forever creating a safe space, brimming with peace of mind and joy inexpressible. The enemy of our souls has convinced the masses that marriage is superficial, disposable, and unnecessary. The culture applauds sexual promiscuity, changing partners like we change our socks. But make no mistake as to the devastating effects on our bodies, minds, and ultimately, the culture at large. I have held and cried with women who are bound up with anxiety, panic, and anger as they try to navigate the effects of their own past choices and/or the pain of being the victim of a predator’s twisted desires.

Only until a woman (or a man…I have direct dealings with women, as I am one myself) gets deep, focused healing in the part of her soul that’s been fragmented from sexual experiences that were never God’s intentions for His creation, will she be on a healing journey of restoration. If she ignores this necessary step and lives life as if the past never happened nor ever mattered, the ugly will continue to show through stunting her emotional growth and preventing her from truly experiencing the freedom that Christ intended for His daughters.

So what about you? Have you honestly dealt with this? Do you realize what God was intending us to see spiritually in the physical sexual union? I’ve been on a healing journey for many years and the freedom is sweet. But it didn’t come suddenly. It’s a matter of continual offering the pain and guilt back to the reality of what was accomplished on the cross. Jesus took our guilt and shame and pardoned the wrong. We have to give it to Him, though. And we have to get real with the emotional mess it created in the first place.

If you were/are a victim of a predator’s sexual sin, please seek help. It wasn’t your fault…you are not to blame. But you need support and help to experience freedom from its devastating effects.

Ransomed Heart Ministries offers the following Prayer for Sexual Healing. I highly recommend getting started with this healing tool:

Also, this book is very well written and helpful for deeper understanding of this topic: What Are You Waiting For by Dannah Gresh:

And my personal favorite: Sex and the Soul of a Woman by Paula Rinehart:

So go for it! You are worth it, no matter how worthless you might be feeling currently.

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Lori Travers

Lori finds the Joy of the Lord to be her strength. Born and raised an Italian Jersey girl, she has finally settled in the south as Reynolda Presbyterian church became her new home. Ministry to women, reading, writing, cooking, and anything having to do with animals are her sweet spots. Having a background in cardiac testing, she chose to stay home and raise three incredible children who are now married, and currently has 2 precious granddaughters and one faithful husband of 34 years.

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