The Biggest Mistakes College Students Make [Part 2]
- September 11, 2018
- Pete Hardesty
Last week I highlighted the first 5 mistakes college students make. You can see that post HERE.
This week here are numbers 6-10 of the mistakes most commonly made by college students.
6. Throwing all caution to the wind and doing whatever you feel like.
a. You hear so many voices about what true success is and about where to find real life. Most of them are wrong or temporary. And many are self-serving and have something to sell you.
b. First semester freshman year is the only time of my life I wish I could have a Redo. Your present will become your past which will affect your future. Andy Stanley is big on this concept. It’s true. To do whatever you “feel like”is not true freedom. It’s actually immaturity. It will rob you of your freedom. FEELINGS ARE GOOD FRIENDS BUT TERRIBLE MASTERS.
7. Jumping into the hook-up culture. This robs you of what can be a beautiful part of college–dating and finding out who you are and what you want.
There are 2 things (among many!) that our culture will tell us about sex that aren’t true:
#1: Sex is just physical AND
#2: Sex is no big deal.
Sex is so much more than physical. If it was only physical, our laws wouldn’t have a separate charge for rape. It would just be assault. Also, all of us know a couple who was having sex, broke up and get back to together. Over and over. Even if they are a terrible match and both know they shouldn’t be together.
Sex is emotional, mentoal, spiritual, and even chemical. Do you know that we are still learning the science behind it but part of what happens in the two partners is the same chemical interaction as when a mom breast feeds her baby! This bonds the 2 partners together and that’s why this happens.
Our culture will tell us sex is no big deal but we are obsessed. Our society uses sex to sell everything. Anything and everything. If it’s no big deal, why is it on every TV show, every movie, every social media account, etc. It’s a very big deal.
You might think I’m from outer space but I’m going to encourage you to WAIT. You are worth it. You are worth the wait. The data would show that the people who waited the longest to have sex actually had the best sex. And are the happiest. This has nothing to do with religion or background or anything else. Simply how long couples waited to have sex correlates with how happy they are.
We can’t control our past but we can control our future.
8. Not interacting with your family the correct amount. You need to find your rhythm but often students keep ties with their family too tight or they don’t stay in touch with them enough. If you are going home every other weekend, that is probably too much, unless there is a situation that needs your attention. (not just a girlfriend or boyfriend). You should emotionally go to college.
9. Not initiating or taking risks. Don’t play it safe. College is the time for exploration, adventure, and living different stories.
10. Not asking for help. Ask for help and ask for it early. You are not meant to do this journey alone! Allowing challenges to become full-blown crises. Check it out early. There are a lot of people who want to see you succeed. If it’s not your family, it will be your friends, the right professor, and often there are free health services.
You have a lot of people in your corner. You have a lot of people who want to see you make it and have the best college experience you can have. I am one of them. Let me know how I can help.